Weights & Measures

The more I paint, the more I think about why I paint. The thing about doing something a lot is you start to get some results that really resonate with you. Art has been a constant in my life (to varying degrees) for as long as I can remember. And it’s taken as long for me to realise why I paint what I paint, and why I paint how I paint (hopefully you’re still following after that absolute punisher of a sentence!)

The way I work sways between intention and intuition. There is an ‘I want to’ element in the beginning. In the case of Weights & Measures, I wanted to express the personal, emotional difficulties I have experienced since losing my mother and becoming a mother myself. Intuition fills the gaps between the contrived compositions, ensuring that the subtle, more abstract intentions are not lost or overshadowed.

Death and birth are life’s two most transformative experiences. Both entail a kind of loss. In the instance of death there is the loss of someone you love deeply, and the loss of a life you thought you would experience with them. In the instance of birth, there is a loss of Self, of independence as you’ve only known it and a loss of the only way of living you’ve ever known.

Of the two, I couldn’t tell you which I’ve found more challenging to grapple with. The Death and the Birth happened at the same time. They’re so closely entangled I couldn’t tell you for who I was actually grieving, me or my Mum. For all intents and purposes it was one in the same.

I lost myself for a few years. I was numb. Then angry. Then depressed. When you’re in survival mode there is no room for introspection or reflection. Its difficult to understand why you do what you do when your lizard brain is in control. 

Weights & Measures became the conduit for the kind of metacognition I needed in the wake of enormous personal transformation. There were states of being, emotions and awarenesses I had in me that needed an out, and this series is what happened.

The works that emerged from this state of mind are pensive, sensory and solitary. These are paintings of me with myself, sometimes in confrontation, sometimes in solidarity. They are an exploration of my psyche, ego, shadow and the archetypes most present with me in this chapter of my life and mark the beginning of a new way of relating to my painting practise.

But thats just me! What were your impressions of the paintings? What resonated with you and why do you think that particular work spoke to you?

Want to see the whole collection?

https://ashleeohaganart.com/weights-measures

Interested in collecting?

https://ashleeohaganart.com/originals/weights-measures-collection